Target tricked me: shame on them!

Ever since high school, when my curly haired sister got a hairdresser’s recommendation for appropriate shampoos and conditioners for our hair type, I have been using Biolage Hydrating Shampoo (or hydrathérapie for those in the know) and the matching Biolage (Ultra-)Hydrating Conditioner. I know, I know; matching shampoos and conditioners? But it’s my HAIR.

Biolage is thick and rich and smells like natural oils and soothing butters and is like delicious I-want-to-smell-your-head lotion for your mane. It is opaque white and creamy and is an altogether luxurious experience.

Anyway, my current bottle of said shampoo, which I had bought at Rite Aid (I know Biolage is for sale in salons only, but I’ve always bought it at Rite Aid and it’s always been the real thing), was almost out. Finding myself at Target, it seemed prudent to do my shampoo-shopping there. They didn’t have the normal sized bottle, only the big one, and after some waffling over the $22 price tag I got it anyway. I mean what was I supposed to do, get 2-in-1?

I finally took a shower using my new shampoo. But as soon as I opened the bottle I knew something was wrong; the scent wafting towards me was chemical and plebeian. As the inner liquid emerged, my world came crashing down around me: it was clear and viscuous, and reeked of underpaid Southeast Asian child labor.

I was appalled: how could Target DO THIS to me? ME?! I NEED this shampoo! My hair will be groty and pedestrian if I don’t have it! This is a scandal! This is uncouth! This is devious and manipulative and my god, what is this, knock-off Kate Spades on Canal Street?

Moral of this story: never ever buy anything at Target. It’s fake, probably stolen, and it will RUIN your HAIR. Also they sold me stale Sour Patch Kids.

(I am even going to connect this to OWS:

Isn’t it illegal for Target and retailers to sell, for example, the Paul Mitchell finishing spray that clearly states on the bottle: “Guaranteed only when sold by a professional hairdresser, otherwise it may be counterfeit, old, or tampered with?”

“It’s not illegal. We tried to get legislation passed a few years ago (to make diversion illegal) but we were not successful. So, what Target and other retailers are doing is not illegal.”

This questionable economy should be illegal; it harms the manufacturing company’s reputation and legitimate sales and it harms the consumer by unethically hoodwinking them into buying something that is stolen, fake, and/or dangerous. And smells bad. Anyway, the fact that diversion was never outlawed is clearly evidence of the damaging and oppressive influence major corporations, like Target, have on our legislative process.)


One thought on “Target tricked me: shame on them!

  1. It probably has something to do with Israel. Law as a two-tier system where you’re in the upper tier is an entirely different proposition than law as a one-tier system where the denizens are always rigging things to favor themselves. In the former arrangement, the hardest time is for members of the lower tier who are employed as manager-apologists by the upper tier. What is the term? Kapos? Compradors?
    A two-tier system presents basic legal questions at such a bedrock empirical level that it is probably possible to quantify the research. For instance, the co-optation by pay-off of those who cannot be co-opted by the intimidation of the upper class will distort economic activity across the two classes. Hence distortions, as policy-driven market failures, are a way to quantify the degree to which society is divided into two tiers. Deregulation is a possible area for such research.
    A Dr. Sachs of Columbia referred (in speaking recently at the Commonwealth Club of Silicon Valley) to “the mob of Cantor and his cronies” in defending the OWS people whom someone had accused of being a mob.
    If Israel is viewed as a multi-national corporation that is able to write its own regulatory regime (total “regulatory capture”), many seemingly disparate phenomena become comprehensible as elements or aspects of one phenomenon, which combining effect may be the function of science and even thought in general. The oddness of life cannot be explained away, but the anomalies resulting from “special pleading”, the paradoxes we introduce into the world by sloppy thinking, which stems from tendentious terminology, are some of the work we are evidently put here to do–clearing these away.
    And so the question is how Israel can be a “democratic and Jewish state” or even simply “Jewish state”. What does that mean and how are paradoxes that arise handled, by whom, at whose expense? Ask your hair-dresser.
    I learned in the National Guard that one learns to be a soldier by doing the job nobody else wants to do, such as a cook’s. I applied that lesson to the law, and the career field is Israel.
    i”ll bet you could trace your own legal analysis of that bottle of shampoo to Israel. Read over your statement. In saying that, I am adopting the current rationale of law, which is that it expresses the will of the sovereign, alongside of my own, which I take to be the classic, rationale, where “law is a mandate of reason promulgated by authority for the common good”. That is, the will of the sovereign involves the cases both where the mandate is reasonable, so that authority pursues the common good, and where the mandate is not reasonable, and authority does not pursue the common good. As Aquinas said, if civil authority no longer pursues the common good, it is no longer the civil authority. So first trace the will of the sovereign (by whom, upon whom, how) and then judge its reasonability. You arrive at a definition of legitimacy, lawfulness, that a disinterested person can endorse. Then, via the reasoning of “the Carolene footnote”, you establish the basis for democracy: the people must have the means to enact law.

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