So the day got thrown into a pit of hell when I read my horoscope at the coffee shop and it was only three stars. THREE STARS. I don’t want a three star day. Anyway. Although I do have enough for a free coffee now (like, next time, or whatever).
Some Masshole totally cut me off when I was driving, and I honked and him, and he gave me the whole hands in the air “what?! fuck you!” attitude. Fuck him.
And then, I had this awesomely delicious spinach feta croissant that I only had three bites of, and I had to go to the bathroom, so I went to the bathroom, and when I came back, the dumb dog (who, by the way, is weirdly afraid of me) was standing next to my desk with his head all cocked with that sort of guilty “uhh, what’d I do?” dog face, and my croissant WAS GONE.
THE FUCKING DOG ATE MY CROISSANT.
I can’t even tell you how fucking pissed I am. Like, I can’t even work. I try to google something, and then I’m like, where’s my fucking croissant?!?! And now I’m hungry! And I can’t do anything about it! Because the dumb dog ate my croissant!
So really, the question here is, why the hell is there a dog in the office? Yeah, I don’t know, but I tell you, we are SO not friends right now. I think he knows it, too, he’s totally avoiding me.
Man. I could really go for a spinach feta croissant right now. And I can’t even go buy a new one because I spent all my money on the first one. Well, you know what dog? I hope you enjoyed it. Because you are hella never getting my croissants AGAIN.
So assuming the default day is five stars, I lose one for the Masshole, and one for the croissant, things should theoretically only go up from here, unless my horoscope star calculus is off. Remains to be seen.